A few months ago I went on the most incredible unexpected journey in what was a two day Yoni Massage workshop. Today I want to share with you the perspective that was my experience and also the experience of the man that I worked with in the final part of this experience.
Understanding the perspective from both sides, trials and challenges, the joy, the releases and the earth shattering orgasms, all while as women stepping into a role that we are not used to…is something to cherish. As a woman we are so used to being the ‘givers’ and always trying to make sure that we are pleasing our partner so to take the role of being a ‘receiver’ felt completely unnatural.
For many of the men in the room it felt unnatural to take the role of being the giver because most of the time in western society they are the receiver. These men became our rocks, our support, someone that we could lean on, trust and give complete ‘surrender’ to. This experience was the most intense these women have never had in their life time.
So here is MY journey and a beautifully written perspective from one of the four men that I worked with that weekend.
Yoni massage or yonic massage is a type of Tantric massage that primarily focuses on the male genitalia. The massage is viewed ass therapeutic and is sometimes introduced as a method of relieving tension of the vagina. It has been claimed by practitioners to be helpful to achieve fertilisation, although theree is no scientific support for this position.
I’m not sure if anything can quite prepare you for the deep level of trust and surrender from a woman and the responsibility that then comes with that when you perform this sacred sexual healing practice.
It is something that really moved me and kept resonating within me for days and weeks after the weekend workshop. As a man I felt a new and much greater understanding not only of a woman’s sexuality, but also all that she carries with that in her body and especially her yoni, her vagina, her clitoris, her womb.
Whilst there is all the pleasure sensation and power of desire and sexual energy, when you are doing a yoni massage you are also potentially touching this woman’s pain around her own damaging sexual experiences, physical and emotional hurt, shaming of her body either from her family, religion if that’s part of her upbringing and society in general.
So your touch can be helping heal the collective hurt that women have suffered in the hands of men over centuries and millennia as so much gets transferred down in collective memory, experience and in genetic cellular memory.
There is also an opportunity for an amazingly liberating experience for the woman to unashamedly experience and express freely her full sexual desire and sensation knowing this practice is all about her and that as the giver I was there in service to that full expression which was an incredible honour.
There was a lot of lead in with all the other practices first and you still need to ask for permission to enter, so to speak. From there it is all about feel and being really attentive to the woman’s responses.
We had been taught about ‘mapping’ the yoni, effectively touching each part as if you were going around a clock, knowing where the G spot and then moving deeper in very close to the cervix.
I was really aware how different the tension was in the wall of the yoni in each and every part, really subtle changes that all had their own feel and energetic association evoking a whole range of responses from the woman I was working with.
She got very aroused, which isn’t necessarily the goal or doesn’t have to be, but it sure raised the intensity and then raised it some more. As a man you can certainly get aroused too, but then you take that energy and breath it in, circulating it back through your body and directing it back into the woman. It feels like a circular flow and brings your attention back to her, for it is her that you are there for.
It really was like an exploration of every part of her yoni right up to and around the cervix, which is a deep place to go both physically and in every other respect.
When it ended there was an incredible sense of connection and calm and at the same time I felt like I’d had to hold a huge amount of energy. It would be interesting to see if that feels easier to handle with practice as it felt surprisingly tiring due to the level of concentration.
Overall it was a very deep and intimate thing to experience together and even though we barely knew each other it felt very bonding and close. Huge gratitude from both of us is how it felt to me.
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Why would a man do this workshop either single or with their partner?

  • To learn more about the feminine and the way women’s sexual energy works and flows.
  • To become way more present as a man when being around women making you way more aware of the sexual energy and how it is flowing and being able to hold that energy without an agenda. This is a very attractive quality to have as a man so be ready to have women ‘lean in’ and want to get to know you a whole lot more.
  • To learn how to touch a woman all over in a whole variety of ways and really take time to get to know and feel her body.
  • To learn to slow down, slow down and slow down some more! Us men can be just a bit to goal oriented a lot of the time and not allow the woman to feel safe and open herself up to you.
  • To understand and have true reverence for both the incredibly delicate and vulnerable nature of a woman’s emotional side and her yoni itself and how once she is in trust she can unleash her full sexual power.
  • If you are there with a partner it can take your bond, understanding of your partner and level of communication to a much deeper level. It could also be quite confronting so be ready for that, but with that comes healing too.

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What made me enroll in the Yoni massage workshop?
I have been doing various Tantra evenings and workshops for the last seven years which had ranged from being fairly light and introductory to ones involving more touch such as massage and in some cases nudity which had all been very well run and from which I have learnt a lot.
I’ve met several different women who conducted workshops in Yoni and Lingam massage as a form of sexual and emotional healing so had been curious about it all for the last couple of years.
What draws me to this work is a desire to understand women and female sexuality at a deeper level and to further fine-tune my own energetic and emotional sensitivity and bring that back to my relationships and relating in general.
I had known Eyal since 2012, knew his work and his level of knowledge, so when a female friend of mine mentioned the weekend coming up in Melbourne earlier this year and said she thought I might be interested I decided to jump in. I had also been wanting to visit Melbourne again too as I have quite a few friends there so took it as a sign and off we went.
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What was I thinking or feeling about working with someone or people I didn’t know?
Well I love meeting new people and my work as a healthcare professional means I meet new people everyday. From going to numerous events and workshops of all types means I am used to getting on well with people quickly and easily plus I trusted that the people coming to this would all be great to be with.
The bigger issue was that I had to have a woman who was happy to work with me in order to attend, as they needed to keep it gender balanced so that all the women could receive and be happy to work with the men on the course.
As it happened there were only two couples on the course so everyone had to match up partners as we went along. It ended up happening quite organically over the weekend so that in the end I had a different person for each of the four techniques we learned and ended up with someone I had not yet worked with for the Yoni massage part.
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How was I about being approached my Mel to do the Yoni massage itself?
Funnily enough the woman who all along said she was happy to do the yoni massage with me changed her mind an hour before we were to do the final section as she was really enjoying working with different partners and we had already worked together so I was quite relieved when Mel approached me. We had by already had some conversations by this point and had suggested we might do one of the activities together so it all fell into place, which was a relief.
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Why do you think it attracted people aged from 25 to 55?
It was really interesting to see such an age range and I was particularly impressed by the young 25 year old woman who came on her own, not having done very much at all in this area out of a desire to learn more as it takes complete trust from a woman to allow the most intimate part of her body to be touched by someone she doesn’t really know.
Our sexuality is such a fundamental part of who we are that it is of interest at almost any age and as people get older they are often ready to explore further as they are ready to break out of old patterns and beliefs around what is possible or what is ok so are attracted to this work.
It also showed how incredibly well run the whole weekend was that the trust could be built up to that level over two days through our sharing’s, really sound philosophy about the intention and reason for doing and making sure everyone was really clear about what attitude to take. It was an amazing group of people in that way.
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Do I think it was important to have all the other lead in prior to the yoni massage component itself?
Absolutely essential! In effect we were given all the elements of a full Tantric sexual healing session that leads towards the yoni massage bit by bit with detailed explanation and demonstration so that the trust, relaxation and surrender was possible.
We started with a simple hug only it got super charged with intention and the woman I was doing it with went into an orgasmic state with me doing only very light touch at her sacrum and behind her heart.
We went on to do learn more massage based technique ending in a sensuous full body oil massage involving everything except the yoni in order for the woman to get fully in touch with her body, move though and release any tension in her body and build both her trust and desire to allow her yoni to be touched and experience what that could bring her.
 
 


 
 
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Melina Macdonald and Anonymous Partner
Intimacy & Adult Product Lifestyle Educator, Author, Speaker Dating & Sex, Love & Intimacy Expert
www.sacredpotential.com
 
 
 
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